The People Who Inspire

I got the news this week that I've been waiting and hoping for- I've accepted into my dream school, UCSD . From what I understand, even though it is a tough school to get into... that will be the easiest part. And the road to this point hasn't been easy, between juggling being a full time mom, a full time job, volunteer efforts, school and a decently healthy social schedule. Reflecting on the turn my path took, I also thought back to where it began. Obviously, I owe a great deal to my support system and cheerleaders, but I'm thinking more about the seed that was planted that brought me here.

 Last month a very important person in my life passed away. He passed away without me having spoken to him in over fifteen years and without my having a chance to tell him how he was so important in my life. Even worse is that's not the first time that's happened for me.  In the wake of that I've given a lot of thought to the strange Mt. Rushmore of  most influential people (non relative) and the way they've helped to shape my life.

The greatest teachers have no idea where their influence ends and have the ability to bring out the best in their students -(mashup credit Henry Adams and Charles Kuralt).

Several years ago, Gena, the head of my sales area took a professional interest in me and mentored me (for lack of a better word) in my sales approach. At the time I was newly licensed in life insurance although I had been a property/casualty insurance agent for over five years (I know what you're thinking- could my work be any more exotic or enthralling? It may be boring, but it is important) For anyone who doesn't know about insurance and wants to take a nap, life insurance isn't an easy sale. It's not tangible, like your home or your car or even your giant diamond ring. It's emotional- people don't want to think about dying, or their loved ones dying. And there are a slew of other objections to overcome. It takes a lot of hand holding and time- but it truly is the most important and personally rewarding thing  that I sell. Anyway, Gena put together a group that year to coach team members. I usually ended up staying late and picking her brain. She came by my office a few times as well and after the bigger regional sales meetings she'd keep me late to get my thoughts on how we would implement and execute strategies. I ended up with the highest number of sales - my first year- for our group, protected so many families and made pretty fantastic bonuses along the way. My numbers were high that year for a team member in general. Gena passed away from cancer the following year and the group dissolved. It probably didn't mean as much to her as it did to me, but I always remember the time she took and the skills she gave me.

Well before my life took for the mundane in insurance there was a teacher in my formative years whose impact I didn't fully appreciate until a decade later. Mr. Geason may have been the most well loved teacher in my tiny home town as witnessed by the response and outpouring through his struggle with cancer and final days. Before I heard that he was ill, I'd always planned to thank him.... and I don't know why I waited:

      " .... More importantly I wanted to reach out to Mr. G and let him know how much of an impact he's had on my life. He was my English teacher 16 years ago before I moved to California (and he's the only teacher I made it a point to say goodbye to when I left). Back then I was Catie B, the other BHS redhead. I was always a reader, but he defined for me a love of literature. I am still in California, a divorced mom with two kids. I work full time in insurance and volunteer in my free time. I went back to school last semester- I'm waiting to hear back from UCSD to find out if I have been accepted into their literature program (I'm hoping to transition into editing/publishing). And I have been working to find a publisher for the children's novel I wrote. I had hoped one day to be able to thank Mr. Geason for his part in my success, but for now I just really want him to know I'm making the climb. And when I get there, much of the credit will be his. Please pass that along and let him know that it is no small thing to be able to instruct and inspire the way he has for so many, shaping not only our minds, but in some cases the course our lives..."    In truth, I think I waited too long and I'm not sure my message ever reached him. He was a bright light in some tough years, making an already favorite subject even better. His interest was apparent and his attention was coveted by every student lucky enough to have him. He was the embodiment and antithesis of the ripple affect that a great educator can create. I should have said so sooner.

I feel that a teacher doesn't have to  be someone in the confines of a classroom or office.... or even the circle of people you know or have met. Anyone who knows me is well aware of what a die-hard Harry Potter fan I am. What they may not know is that above my writing desk, between my broomstick pens and Harry Potter action figure is a framed picture of J.K. Rowling. That picture went up five years ago, the day I realized finally what I wanted to be when I grew up... (I sometimes feel like the word "adult" very loosely applies to me. Am I responsible? Yes. Adult? Not so sure- in fact my kids think they're being raised by a taller kid who is allowed to drive and drink (just not together)).

Getting back to J.K. Rowling, I'd devoured her work numerous times on a loop over the prior decade. My ex-husband can attest to me ignoring him on our honeymoon to spend time with my early released audio copy of Deathly Hollows. In this instance I will absolutely and unabashedly own up to my healthy dose of hero-worship and fandom. There is no way to quantify or sum up the gift that this woman's imagination is to the world, or lessor mortals like myself who aspire to be even a scintilla as successful at such a special craft. But I'll try anyway. J. K. Rowling is the goal. Touching people's hearts and inspiring such devotion while creating  a labor of love that is so well received- that's the ultimate dream. For me anyway. Making something that people love that lasts. Which kind of segues into my final and most unlikely Mt. Rushmore candidate.

John Cusack. Recently, I was taking a Nexflix break and picked lightweight romcom Must Love Dogs. Holy God, what a festering pile devoid of content- with the sole exception of JC's performance. Joe Everyman, fresh off of a divorce, dissatisfied and restless with the mundane  and leery of the parade of mediocrity in the singles meat market. The character was utterly relatable, so I searched for more titles and rekindled my love of 80's JC along the way (One Crazy Summer- my desert island movie, Better Off Dead- my kids' new favorite, Say Anything- can't believe I'd never seen it). Before my rapture about movies has you thinking this is a fan thing, let me tell you it's not. Cusack is emotional and intellectual eggplant parmesan-  comfort food for my soul. Yes the movies are familiar, but its really the stirring of interest and flashes of insight that I find captivating. In looking through the online bio for titles, I discovered a tidbit about Cusack orchestrating a meeting between Ed Snowden, Dan Ellsburg and Arundhati Roy- I knew who Snowden was, but had to look up the other two... and this is where my mind unfurled like an

Things That Can And Cannot Be Said

ascending firework. I try to avoid politics for the most part. Sure I have opinions, but I mostly keep them to myself as I feel like my interest is superficial at best. I spent years watching the talking heads on MSNBC and found that I came away very angry and bitter... and helpless to affect change. So I put my head in the sand, nestled into my carefully constructed apathy and focused on fervently carving out my piece of happiness within the mechanism, fighting tooth and nail to protect it. But then I read the transcripts of the JC/Roy/& Co. meeting and subsequent discussions. That loud noise was my head being wrenched back above ground. From there I went on to educate myself about topics I previously wouldn't have given a flying fig about, but that ultimately should concern all of us.... the Panama Papers, the Pentagon Papers, the relationship between Google and the NSA in relation to individual privacy, the gender wage disparity... and on and on and on. And much like the Must Love Dogs character, find myself disenfranchised and restless, but in a better way than before. I now realize that overall I may not have much global influence (yet), but in smaller campaigns I am rank and file; my voice adds to the growing numbers and noise. And the more I dig, the greater the list of people I consider to be important influences becomes, like the eloquent and succinct Ms. Roy. The point is, be and stay curious.... And all of this came from a terrible movie. I wouldn't say John Cusack is the reason, but somehow I found his interest fascinating and admirable, and through that began to care again myself. Exit apathy, enter renewed interest.

It doesn't matter where the spark comes from as long as it ignites. So I want to express a heartfelt and resonating "thank you" to the people who have and continue to shape my mind. Embarking on my next adventure of education is all the better for where I've already been.